


Complicating Everything

by jwritesstuff (spilladrop4orpheus)



Category: Bodyguard (TV 2018)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-24
Updated: 2019-05-27
Packaged: 2019-11-29 01:42:05
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18216503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spilladrop4orpheus/pseuds/jwritesstuff
Summary: It wasn’t his job to comfort her. It was to protect her.Some between scenes moments and character introspection.





	1. Chapter 1

Julia sat in the corner of the shower, clutching her knees to her chest, much like she had earlier that day. She didn’t know how long she had been like that in the car, but it had felt like hours, especially after David left to face her would-be assassin. As he had gotten out of the car, she remembers reaching for him, not wanting him to leave her. She needed the small comfort of his hand on hers. The steady tone of his voice reassuring her that everything was going to be okay. The confident look in his eyes despite the desperate situation they had found themselves in. But it wasn’t his job to comfort her. It was to protect her. So he stormed the building alone to keep her safe when no one else would. Her thoughts were clouded with paranoia, and she couldn’t help but think that, with the exception of David, no one in charge of keeping her safe seemed to have done a damn thing when she needed it the most.

These thoughts were interrupted by PC Kim Knowles calling out from the bedroom that she was putting a change of clothes on the bed. In her emotional state, Julia didn’t trust her own voice, but she knew if she didn’t respond it would have caused concern. She had already been in the shower for quite some time. Although the water ran clear a while ago, she couldn't help but feel like she was still covered in Terry’s blood.

“Thank you,” she replied over the noise of the water. Her shaky voice reverberated off of the shower tiles. Even to herself, she sounded so lost and helpless. Vulnerability was not something she let many people see in her, and though Kim was nice enough, Julia hated showing any kind of weakness.

When the tears running down her face were warmer than the water running over her, she knew it was time to leave the relative safety of the shower. She was shaking, though from the water temperature or the day’s events, she couldn't tell. As she stepped out, she was glad to see that her blood-stained suit was nowhere to be found. Kim must have removed it, though she wasn’t sure if this was a polite gesture or because it was needed as evidence of some sort. She was just grateful it was gone.

As she was getting dressed, she heard voices from the other side of the hotel bedroom door. She knew one belonged to Kim. The other she assumed was Rob’s, who had brought her the change of clothes she kept at the office. _Of course he was still here._ He wouldn't leave without seeing her, not the way he's been ramping up his affection. She put up with his little crush but hoped that it would eventually go away. That didn't seem to be the case as lately, his attempts were bordering on inappropriate. If only that had been the worst of her problems.

Her hand shook as she reached for the door connecting the bedroom to the living area. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. Steeling herself, she opened the door to see Kim and Rob look towards her, concern etched across both of their faces. She resigned herself to the fact that she would see those looks a lot from just about everyone she came across in the near future. Julia Montague was now a victim. She will become a footnote in history and today will follow her like a shadow for the rest of her career. Julia hated the idea of anyone pitying her and decided to put on her bravest face, even if she was falling apart on the inside.

“Do you need anything, ma'am?” Kim asked.

“No, thank you.”

“I’ll be heading out then. Unless…” Kim gave a subtle look towards Rob. “You’d like me to stay.”

Julia was grateful for the offer, but if she couldn’t hold it together, she’d rather have as few witnesses as possible. She didn’t plan on having Rob stay for very long anyway. “Thank you, Kim. But it’s been a long day. Go home and hug your family.”

“Thank you, ma’am. I’ll be here in the morning to pick you up. We should be able to stop by your place to pick up any personal items you'll need for your stay here.”

“Thank you.”

As soon as the door was closed, Rob moved towards her. “My God, Julia.” He said as he pulled her into an awkward hug that she ended quickly. “I'm so glad you weren't hurt. I was sick with worry when I heard the news. How are you doing?”

“I’m fine.” She was far from fine, but she didn’t want any needless fussing from him. “Thank you for bringing me a change of clothes.”

“Of course. Anything you need, I'm here for you.” He placed a hand on her shoulder and guided her towards the couch.

She sat at the far end, her legs folded up next to her, in hopes of keeping Rob at a respectable distance.

His disappointment was evident as he sat down towards the other end of the couch. There was a long, awkward pause before he addressed her. “Have you eaten? Perhaps we could order room service. Maybe some wine to calm your nerves.”

“I’m not hungry.”

“You really do need to eat something, especially after what you’ve been through.”

“I said I’m fine!” It was a little harsher than she had intended, but she was in no mood for his hovering. “I think I’d just like to go to bed soon.”

“I could stay if you like.” He placed his hand on hers as it rested on her knee. “You shouldn’t be alone after what happened.”

She almost couldn’t believe the audacity and persistence. Despite her repeated rebuffing of his advances, he was still making attempts hours after she had nearly been killed. Having had enough, she stood up quickly.

“No, that won’t be necessary.” She grabbed his jacket off the end of the couch and held it out to him. “Thank you for stopping by, Rob.”

Reluctantly, he took the hint. “If you need anything, anything at all, Julia, do call.”

“I’ll be fine. Thank you.” She opened the door and held it, eager for him to leave.

As Rob exited, the PC outside her door gave her a sympathetic look. “Any more visitors for the evening, ma’am?”

She saw Rob slow down and turn his head slightly as he headed down the hall, eager to hear her answer. “No. No one else.”

“Try and get some rest then, ma’am. We’re here if you need us.”

“Yes, thank you.”

The thought should have comforted her, but it didn’t. She didn’t feel safe, not even locked away with armed police guards at every door. The only person she trusted to keep her safe at the moment was David. She hadn’t seen him in the aftermath of the shooting, except for a brief glimpse of him on the rooftop, looking down at her like a guardian angel. He had single-handedly saved her life, but she was whisked away so quickly once the threat was gone that she never got to say thank you or check up on him.

She wanted to see for herself that he was unharmed and, if she was completely honest with herself, she wanted him to reach for her hand again, look her in the eyes, and tell her that everything was going to be okay. She thought about calling him but hesitated. What would she say to him? Would he come if she asked? Maybe she was the last person he wanted to see right now…the woman who almost got him killed. She assumed he was spending time with his kids after such a traumatic ordeal, and of course, his wife. Maybe this would be the catalyst that ended their separation. Times of crisis did have a tendency to bring people together. The idea of David reconciling with his wife bothered her a lot more than she thought it should.

On her way to the living room, she caught her reflection in the mirror near the coat closet and almost didn’t recognize herself. Red, puffy eyes stared back at her. She didn't have any makeup to conceal the after-effects of crying. She hadn’t even bothered with her hair after stepping out of the shower. No wonder everyone was looking at her the way they did. She felt silly for caring about her appearance given the situation, but she took great care in trying to control how people perceived her. It all came back to not wanting to show weakness. David had already seen her at her most vulnerable though. She didn’t think it could get any worse than a hysterical woman covered in blood, screaming on the floor of a car.

She sat on the couch of her suite, taking in her surroundings. It was a nice room, the nicest The Blackwood had to offer. Still, she would have preferred the familiarity of home. Sitting alone with her thoughts, she could feel a tightness forming in her chest again. Her eyes welled with tears as she replayed the shooting, something she had done countless times already that day. The sudden buzzing of her phone caused her to jump, letting out a shriek. Fortunately, it hadn’t been loud enough to alter the guard at the door. She didn’t know how she was going to make it through the night in this state. She wished she could just turn her off her thoughts so she didn’t have to feel so scared and alone.

Walking over to her phone, she tried calming herself with deep breaths. It wasn’t helpful. She read the new text that had startled her. It was from Stephen Hunter-Dunn and just read: We need to talk. No kind words of sympathy or inquiries into how she was feeling, just straight to business. She shouldn’t have expected anything more from the Director General of the Security Service. It made her feel more like Home Secretary Julia instead of victim Julia. She hoped that Stephen would be able to give her more information than she was getting from the police. There were so many questions that demanded answers, and she wouldn’t rest peacefully until she had them. Not one to sit idly by, she resolved herself to getting the information she needed from whatever source, and she knew just where to start. Picking up her phone, she hit the contact she had saved in her phone as David/Dave and held her breath as it rang.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's my attempt at explaining that mystery robe that appeared.

_This is a bad idea._

David knew this and yet, he still he found himself with Julia Montague, the Home Secretary, in his arms. Their lips were close enough that the slightest of movements from either of them would bring them together. They both paused, giving the other, and possibly themselves, the chance to stop anything before it started. David wasn’t sure who moved first, but once he felt her lips on his, it didn’t matter. His hand instinctually moved to the back of her head to keep her close. From the moment he gave in to her embrace and had his arms wrapped around her, he had wanted to keep her there. It reassured him that she was alive…that she was safe. For a few agonizing moments during the shooting, he had had his doubts.

_Crouching low in the seat of the car, he couldn't hear anything other than the ringing in his ears and his own ragged breathing. He could see that Terry was dead, but he couldn't see Julia behind the passenger seat. He felt the impact of more bullets hitting the car, but all he could focus on was the panic taking over his body. For several seconds, he found himself back in Afghanistan when his armored vehicle had been attacked. He was reliving one of the worst moments of his life when the sound of screaming brought him back to the present. Julia! They were Julia’s screams. She was alive, and it was his duty to keep her that way. More bullets hit the side of the car, and he heard her cry out again. He hit the seat in frustration over not being able to get to her. Her finger grazed his where it rested on the side seat, and he took the opportunity to grab her hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. Looking at her from between the seat and the door, he told her everything was going to be okay, even if he didn’t quite believe it himself. All he knew was that he'd have given anything at that moment to get rid of the look of terror he saw in her eyes. A terror that he was feeling as well. He pushed his fear aside and focused on her. He’d do his duty and keep her safe._

_Keep her safe!_ That's what he was supposed to do, not kiss her in her hotel suite late at night. He gently grabbed her shoulders and pulled away. His eyes stayed closed for just a moment as he tried to control himself. He opened his eyes just in time to see the disappointment flash across her face before she cast her eyes down. He wasn't used to seeing her so unsure of herself. This was not the Julia Montague he had come to know over the past few weeks, and it certainly wasn’t the one he was used to seeing on television. He knew all too well how a traumatic event could make you a shell of the person you once were.

“I’m sorry, ma’am. I…” He trailed off as he wondered if he was apologizing for kissing her or for stopping. His hands rested on her shoulders, as he couldn’t bring himself to pull away completely. He felt her shiver under his touch. “You’re trembling. You could be in shock.”

“Isn’t that what happens when someone tries to kill you?” She asked, almost laughing at the absurdity of her situation as her hands made their way to his chest, just above his heart. “Your heart is racing.” Her eyes finally met his again, and she raised an eyebrow giving him a challenging look. “Maybe you’re the one in shock.”

There was a spark of the Julia he knew. His heart was pounding, but it wasn’t from the shooting. He knew the reason, and it was staring him in the face waiting for a response. He could have chalked it up to shock and ended this little dance they had started, but a part of him was just reckless enough to keep it going.

“It’s got nothing to do with the shooting.” His eyes darted from hers to her lips and back again.

The admission elicited another shiver from her. He glanced at the shirt that hung loosely on her shoulders, trying not to think about how tempting her exposed skin looked.

“We need to keep you warm. Do you have something else you could put on?”

She gave him a curious look. “The police are going over my home. I only have this change of clothes that Rob picked up from my office.”

_Rob._ David wasn't a fan. He was surprised the little weasel wasn’t here trying to “comfort” her. He had watched Rob’s pathetic attempts to win Julia over with a mix of amusement and annoyance. He couldn’t help but wonder if Rob would have finally gotten what he wanted if he were here to take advantage of the situation. The thought unsettled him in more ways than one. Rob wasn’t here though. She had called him. She wanted him here. That counted for something. His insecurities told him it was only because he was the one to save her. Of course she would latch on to him for security. It didn’t mean anything. It couldn’t.

David glanced around the elegant suite looking for a coat closet that should be stocked with an extra blanket. A white, fluffy robe hanging in the closet caught his attention instead. He grabbed it along with the blanket that was on the shelf and held the robe out to Julia. “This should help. It’ll be warmer than what you’re wearing. You want to keep your neck wrapped up.” He had every intention of wrapping her up and making sure she was settled for the night, then leaving before they did something they’d both regret in the morning.

She reached for the robe, and her fingers briefly touched his as she took it from him. He tried to ignore the feelings it evoked in him. Julia seemed to have other plans. Instead of retreating to the bedroom like he thought she would, she grabbed the hem of her shirt to lift it over her head.

David was quick to turn around, giving her privacy, much like he had at the television studio.

“Quite the gentleman, aren’t you?” She teased as she put the robe on.

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Tell me, David, are you always such a gentleman?” She asked. The meaning behind her question hung in the air between them.

He didn't hear the brokenness and insecurity in her voice that he had heard earlier. He paused before replying, carefully considering if he was going to play along. “No, ma’am. Not always,” he said, the smirk on his face evident through his voice. Some very un-gentleman-like thoughts had been racing through his mind since their kiss…and, if he was honest, before then as well. He heard her bare feet pad across the plush rug behind him before she stopped and reached for his hand.

Turning around slowly, he stared first at her hand in his for a few moments, before his attention was directed elsewhere. He had hoped that the robe would tame some of the desire he was feeling, but one look at the long shapely legs that were now exposed under the hem told him he had been sorely mistaken. The blanket he had meant to wrap her in fell to the floor as his eyes traveled the length of her body before finally meeting hers. All he could do was stare, unsure of what to do next. They were on the edge of something very dangerous again. His body was ready to give in, but his mind was giving him a hundred reasons not to. He waited for her to convince him.

***

Julia would be lying if she said she hadn’t imagined what it would be like to kiss him. He was an attractive man after all, and her love life had been pretty much nonexistent lately. It had been a mere fantasy though, not something she actually entertained doing for several very good reasons. Then his arms were around her with his face so close to hers, and none of those reasons had seemed important at that exact moment. She tried to tell herself that this hadn’t been her plan all along, that she had only wanted a comforting embrace…some human contact. Manipulation was a skill she had honed during her political career, and while not exactly proud of it, it was useful. She could do it without even realizing it, and she wondered if her devious subconscious had been plotting this since the moment she decided to call him. Once her lips were on his though, she no longer cared how they got there.

When he had pulled away, she glanced down, not wanting to be subjected to that analytical gaze of his. She barely knew how she felt, she didn’t need him trying to sort it out as well. All she knew for sure was that she had felt alive for the first time that day. When he pulled away, he took that feeling with him. She wanted it back…and more. She wanted David. He was the perfect distraction to keep away the dark thoughts that had been haunting her all evening. More than that, he made her feel safe.

She felt his heart pounding beneath her palms. When he admitted that he was affected by their kiss, she became even more determined to go after what she wanted. He, however, remained the dutiful PPO with robe and blanket in hand, trying to keep her from going into shock. His protectiveness was appreciated, but it only served as a reminder of what she needed protecting from in the first place. Thinking about that was the last thing that she wanted, but it couldn’t be stopped. They had both faced death that day, a first for her. It wasn’t the first time he’d been in a life or death or situation, and she briefly wondered if it got easier. She didn’t ask him, not really wanting to find out.

As he turned to face her after she had changed, she could see the conflict in his eyes. Conflict that had mirrored her own only minutes ago before she decided consequences be damned. Maybe he needed this just as much as she did. She hoped he at least wanted it as much as she did. She rubbed the back of his hand with her thumb. “I don’t think either of us should be alone tonight.” She watched as his conflicted stare changed to one of determination at her words. He gave a gentle tug on her hand and pulled her in for another kiss, this one less tentative than before.


	3. Chapter 3

There are always consequences. Julia knew this, and still, she did what she did. Those consequences that didn’t seem so important a while ago, loomed over her as she was lying next to her partially undressed and still partially married PPO. She was not in any frame of mind to deal with the aftermath, so she did something out of character for her, a theme for that evening…she ran away. Retreating to the bathroom was the only thing she could think to do when the awkwardness between her and David became unbearable.

She left him on the bed without saying a word, effectively dismissing him. To his credit, he didn't get up and go right away. He waited a decent amount of time before he gave up on her returning. Relief and sadness washed over her when she had finally heard the door close behind him. Then she was no better off than she was a few hours ago. She was scared and alone, only now she had the added weight of sleeping with the man assigned to protect her.

It was the trauma, she told herself. One could hardly blame her for seeking comfort in the arms of an attractive man after what she went through. She knew that’s not how the world worked though. If this ever got out, she would be blamed. At best her name would be batted around in the press. They’d call her a home-wrecker and label him as her boy-toy. At worst, she’d lose her job and everything she had worked for all of these years. They’d say she took advantage of a subordinate. She supposed there would be some truth to that. She should have known better, and she did push him a little, but he certainly hadn’t seemed to mind. He was an active participant, not to mention an enthusiastic one. Her mind was fresh with the memory of how he had touched her. She shivered as she recalled his fingertips ghosting over her skin. He had been tender and attentive, everything she had needed then. Despite that, a part of her knew it should have never happened, and it could never happen again.

No longer needing to hide, she left the confines of the bathroom. The rumpled sheets served as an unwelcome reminder, so she made her way to the living room. Her clothes were still on the floor where she left them as she had brazenly stripped with David mere feet from her. She noticed his jacket, also forgotten on the floor after she had slid it off his broad shoulders. It was the only piece of his clothing she had managed to remove, despite her best efforts. Shaky fingers had fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, only managing to get half of them undone before his hands met hers, stilling her movements. With her hand in his, he turned and led her into the bedroom where she abandoned her struggle with the frustrating buttons.

She couldn’t help but think that he had wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible if he left without his jacket. God, what must the other officers have thought when they saw him leave her room this late at night with less clothing than he came in with? There was nothing she could do about it now. What’s done is done. She had no choice but to deal with whatever was going to happen next. She felt that tightness return to her chest again. Not wanting to return to the bed, Julia picked up the blanket that David had dropped on the floor and settled on the couch with it. She couldn't hold it in any longer, and the tears began to fall once more. She cried over everything that happened in the past 12 hours. With all of her energy drained, she finally drifted off to sleep.

 

David had been missing from her protection detail that next day. She was told that he was giving his statement, filing a report, and being interviewed by his superiors about the shooting.

“All standard procedure, ma’am,” Kim had assured her.

She was relieved but knew that his absence was just postponing the inevitable. She would have to face him eventually…unless he requested a reassignment. That thought had been one of many that plagued her the night before. Did he regret it? Would he ask to be assigned to someone else? Would that be for the best? She thought of how upset she had been when he had been taken off her detail after the bombing near the school. She had practically thrown a tantrum in a meeting over it. Even then she did a poor job of controlling her feelings when it came to David. She knew it was bound to be worse now. Trying to push thoughts of David aside, she tried focusing on that she had to face that day. It all involved dealing with the fallout from the shooting. She knew she could spin this to her advantage regarding her proposed policies, and she would, but she couldn’t help but feel guilty. She didn’t want to use Terry’s death like that, but she had little choice on how to handle the situation effectively. Not one to back down, pushing forward with her policy was the only way she could proceed. The shooting, unfortunately, would be all anyone would be talking about for the next few days at least, so she could use that to her advantage. Turn the attention away from her being a victim and towards national security. She would make it clear, Julia Montague was a fighter, not a victim.

 

On the way to the office the next morning, Kim broke the news that David would be staying in the adjoining hotel room as an extra precautionary security measure. If Kim had noticed the color drain from Julia’s face in the rearview mirror, she didn’t say anything. “Oh,” was all Julia managed to say as she thought about the trouble that could lead to.

She knew that meant David would be back, but that didn’t stop her from being caught off guard when his piercing blue eyes were staring at her as he held the car door open. Those eyes that had stared into hers as he whispered, “Are you sure?” The same blue eyes that had seemed so soft that night as he studied her. With every new journey his hands took, his eyes found hers, looking for any sign of hesitation. Her eyes never once told him no.

Now he looked just as intense, but the gentleness was gone, replaced with his usual calculating stare. There was almost a coldness to them as he held the door open, waiting for her to exit the car.

“Morning, ma’am.” His voice gave nothing away. There wasn’t even a hint of emotion to be detected. How could he appear so calm when she felt so disoriented? Maybe it really did mean nothing to him. That would be for the best, she supposed.

She gave him a curt smile before lowering her eyes. She could barely look at him, much less speak to him.

Kim got out of the car after Julia, addressing David. “You did good the other day, Skip. We’re all proud of you. Glad to know the principal is in such capable hands.”

Julia was grateful that they were walking behind her so as not to see her flushed face. She was intimately aware of how capable his hands were. This was going to be a long day.


	4. Chapter 4

Watching her was a big part of his job, and David didn't have any complaints about that. Julia was a beautiful woman, and it was fascinating to watch the way she commanded a room. She could have everyone’s attention just by walking in. Part of that was her position as Home Secretary, but it was more than that. There was something about her that made people take notice, something purely Julia. You couldn't help but get taken in by her, which is why David found himself in his current predicament. He had slept with her when he was supposed to protect her, and he was now tasked with spying on her by his superiors. He wasn't sure how he felt about either situation. He wasn't sure how he felt about Julia. It had all become so complicated.

He was attracted to her, of course. There was no denying that. But during those first few days, he had thought he hated her. He soon learned that what he hated was the abstract idea of her…The Right Honorable Julia Montague. A caricature created by the media, those who worked with her, and opposing parties to further their own agendas. Their differences in political views made it easy to demonize her based solely on her policies before he had known anything real about her. Over the past few weeks, he found himself enjoying her company and he came to see that she was so much more than her title and political party. He had seen the good and the bad, so he thought he had a pretty good idea as to who she is. That is until Craddock and Sampson made him question everything he thought he knew. He went over everything he had learned about Julia to try and sort it all out. There were a few traits that still held true, whatever Julia’s motivations may be.

He knew right away that she was a very intelligent woman. One look at her education and career history told him that. As he watched her at the office, he could tell that she was leagues above many of the people there. The incompetence of those around her seemed to be an increasing source of frustration for her. She held people to a high standard, but no higher than the one she held herself to. He could respect that about her. Her high standards often left her disappointed though, and she was not shy about expressing that fact. Her quick wit and sharp tongue were formidable. That had led to his next observation.

Julia Montague had a temper. He would watch amused as she directed her frustrations towards whatever unfortunate person had managed to cross her. He had found himself on the receiving end of her anger, especially during those first few days he was assigned to her. No one was safe if she felt they were in the wrong. He heard that she had given his boss’s boss a verbal takedown on a couple of occasions during meetings with several prominent people. She was not afraid to make enemies, and recent events showed that she had made them.

Despite her icy demeanor, David came to see that she did care about people. He may not agree with her methods, but he thought the sentiment was sincere. She did help his son, though if Anne Sampson were to be believed, that was merely an attempt to win him over and make him play the dutiful bodyguard. He didn’t want to believe that, but he couldn’t shake the idea from his mind now. David knew she wasn't always completely honest, no politician was, but he didn't detect a lie when she told him about her reason for getting into politics. She did seem to want to help people. Maybe somewhere along the way her reasoning just got a little misguided. It was easy to focus on the end result without worrying too much on how you got there. He could tell her focus was firmly on her goal of becoming Prime Minister, and she was aligning herself with the wrong kind of people to get there.

He learned quickly that she was very ambitious, maybe too ambitious, and that is were his doubts about her surfaced. There was the issue of the terror attack at the school. He couldn't stop thinking about what Anne Sampson had told him. Would Julia really leave children, specifically his children, at risk to further her political career? Did she want #10 bad enough that she would do anything for it? The private meetings with Stephen Hunter-Dunn were suspicious. Her voting record showed she had no qualms about putting innocent men and women at risk by sending them to war. The two situations weren't the same, but his proximity to both clouded his judgment. He wanted to believe her, but he knew she was hiding something about knowing his kids’ school. It was hard to reconcile the idea that the woman he had come to know would do something like that. She had shown genuine concern when telling him what school the attack had been near. She was under no obligation to tell him, so if she was hiding something about it, why would she take the risk in volunteering that information? It didn’t make sense, but it also didn’t make sense how she knew the name of the school his kids went to in the first place. David was going to go mad if he kept going around in circles on this issue. He was no closer to reaching a conclusion on her motivations, so he studied her through the glass wall of her office.

Something was off with her, and rightfully so considering what she'd been through. She tried to act like the day was business as usual, but he could tell it was anything but. No one gets over a traumatic event that quickly, not even the great Julia Montague. As much as she would like people to believe otherwise, she was still shaken up over Thornton Circus. Add to that their night together, which he assumed she was regretting, and it was no wonder he picked up on some subtle but out of the ordinary behaviors. She was usually very focused in the office, completing tasks with efficiency as she moved on to the next issue. Today he caught her staring off into space several times while sitting at her desk as well as during meetings. He knew that look. He had had that same vacant stare many times himself. No one else around Julia seemed to notice, which didn’t surprise him. Standing there, unnoticed in the background, he overheard a lot of conversations that went on. He knew a lot more than he let on about the interoffice politics at the Home Office. Looking around the office, he didn’t see many people who seemed to show genuine concern for Julia other than how she could benefit them. In fact, he didn’t doubt that any one of them would happily stab Julia in the back the moment it suited them. It was one of the things he hated most about politics and the people involved. Most of the people seemed to be out for themselves. He turned his attention back to Julia. Was she only out for herself as well?

He had caught her looking in his direction, and she averted her eyes as soon as his landing on her. Usually, their eyes would meet several times throughout the day. She would glance at him from her office, holding his gaze for a few moments while continuing to talk to whoever was in her office. She had never shied away from eye contact with him before. Most people found prolonged eye contact to be unsettling, but not Julia, not with him anyway. Today though, she had avoided looking at him, appearing flustered whenever their eyes met. He took some satisfaction in the fact that he unnerved her just a little. It was the only reaction he had been able to get from her. He had been completely ignored by her since she wordlessly left him alone in her bed.

She had told him that neither of them should be alone that night. He had been taken in by the sincerity in her voice as well as the implication she was making. Those were the last actual words she had spoken to him. The gasps and moans in his ear that came after that didn’t count. But then she left him after she had gotten what she wanted. He couldn’t help but feel a little used. Though loathe to admit it, he realized that he had used her too in a way. The trauma they had faced opened some old emotional wounds that hadn’t even begun to heal yet, and Julia was a temporary relief from that. It had been nice to be wanted by a beautiful woman again. He hoped it wasn’t taking advantage of her as she seemed to want it as much as he did, but the circumstances that led to their encounter, as well as her reaction afterward, made him feel a little guilty.

No. David wasn’t going to feel guilty. He was mad. Mad at Julia for keeping secrets and for tossing him aside. She might have the luxury of being able to ignore him, but his whole job was to focus on her. How was he supposed to do that in a professional manner now that he knew her lips were every bit as soft as they looked? Now that he knew what she felt like underneath him? The sounds she made when he touched her.

Memories of that night flooded his thoughts. He could almost feel the gentle caress of her fingers on his face as they kissed. Her hands had trailed down his neck and to his chest under his half unbuttoned shirt. He had stopped her trembling fingers before, but they found their way back to the buttons on his shirt. He had wanted to avoid her noticing his scars, a reminder of what bullets and metal could do to a person. She had seen enough destruction for one day. With care, he took her hand and placed it on the bed next to her head. Her fingers intertwined with his keep him there. That was their lifeline. Hands connecting them to each other like they had in the car.

David was brought out of his flashbacks by the sound of the elevator doors. Kim was stepping out as he turned to look, signaling that the day was coming to an end.

“The car is waiting downstairs in the underground. The Principal requested that we use that exit at night from now on.” Kim informed him.

David shared a look with her as Julia exited her office for the evening and approached them. They both knew that using the underground entrance and exit had been his preference from the beginning. He turned to Julia as she reached them.

“PC Knowles was just telling me of your idea to use the underground exit now. Excellent idea, ma’am. Wish I’d thought of it.”

The sarcasm dripping off his Scottish brogue did not go unnoticed.

Kim stared at David, a little shocked at his audacity. Speaking to the Principal like, particularly when its Julia Montague, was a surefire way to get reassigned or even demoted.

He knew Kim would be even more shocked if she knew just what other liberties he had taken with the Principal.

His comment finally caught Julia’s attention too, earning him a classic Julia Montague death glare. He’d take it. David figured it was definitely better than being ignored. He entered the elevator after Julia and Kim, feeling quite pleased with himself.

The drive to the hotel was long thanks to new security measures that avoided common routes. Between scanning the road for anything out of the ordinary, he would watch her in the rearview mirror. As he caught glimpses of her under the passing street lights, he noticed her labored breathing and eyes darting over the back of the car. He turned to look at her and saw the white knuckle death grip that she had on the seat’s edge. Without caring how it would appear to the new driver, he reached back for her hand. He suppressed the urge to jump back there and pull her into his arms. Their eyes locked and he gave her an understanding smile. He could see her starting to calm down. Her eyes were wide as they stared at each other, first with fear, then with a look he recognized from the other night. She gave a slight nod, letting him know she was okay before pulling her hand away. She turned her head to look out the window, leaving him to contemplate how he felt about her. He still hadn’t been able to figure it out.

The closer they got to the hotel, the more conflicted David began to feel. By the time they reached the Blackwood service entrance he had thought he would lose his mind if he thought about her any longer. Fortunately, he was very good at hiding his inner turmoil. His usual stoic self greeted the guards as he and Julia passed them. The elevator door closed and it was the first time he and Julia were alone since their night together…alone and headed to their hotel rooms that had a shared door between them. It was impossible not to think about what that shared door could lead to. He knew she was thinking about it as well. She had to be.

He had never experienced the expression “tension so thick you could cut it with a knife,” until that very moment. It hung in the air, a mix of nerves, uncertainty, and desire. He clenched his jaw as his eyes bore a hole into the elevator door. He could feel her next to him, closer than they usually stood. He was more conflicted about his feelings than ever. It took every ounce of self-control he had not to look at her. If he did, he was certain he would push her against the wall and kiss her senseless or shake her until she gave him the answers he wanted. Either scenario was just as likely at that moment.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always intend to update sooner, but then I spend the week rewriting, adding, and editing until Sunday evening rolls around and I just post whatever I have. Maybe next week I won't wait until my self-imposed deadline.

The elevator ride to her floor at The Blackwood seemed to go on forever. Their floor…David would be staying in the room next to hers. The tension on the ride up was almost unbearable. She had resorted to cool indifference in their limited interactions that day, a poor defense mechanism she admitted. A polite smile and refusing to look at him was all she could muster. A quick glance out of the corner of her eye saw his jaw tighten as he stared straight ahead. If she were going to say anything, this would be the time, but she didn’t know where to begin. The elevator dinged saving her from rushing into a conversation without a plan. She was out the door as soon as it opened, making her way down the maze of hallways that led to her room. When they got to her door, he unlocked it and stepped aside.

“I'll be in the adjoining room. Have a good evening, ma’am.”

_Was that an invitation?_ “Yeah. You too,” she managed to reply before brushing past him into the safety of her suite.

She set her coat on the sofa and couldn’t help but stare at the door that separated them. Knowing he was just on the other side was too much. She slowly walked toward his room, footsteps echoing around her, announcing her intentions. 

Her mind argued with itself as she cautiously approached. They had already slept together, and she had already made things awkward between them. It couldn’t get much worse if they did it again, could it?

Yeah, it could get worse…so much worse. She once again envisioned salacious details of her personal life plastered across headlines. It was too risky. She had too much to lose. This wouldn’t be some trauma induced reaffirmation of life like the other night. There would be no excuses this time. This would be them making a conscious decision to put their careers in jeopardy. She paused in front of the door, torn between duty and desire.

It wasn't fair, but she knew the expectations placed on her and how they differed from her male colleagues. A woman with her position was not supposed to have affairs and certainly not with a police officer assigned to protect her. Add her divorced status and age, and she was practically expected to live as a nun. The press and her political opponents would use anything to the contrary against her.

_To hell with the lot of them and their double standards._

Since when did Julia Montague ever do what was expected of her? She always found a way to play by her own rules. Her decision was made, and now it was up to David, but first, she had to take that first step and knock on his door to speak with him. She would pose it as clearing the air after the awkwardness of the day. She’d tell him they were adults and they needed to be able to interact with each other in a professional setting regardless of what happened behind closed doors. Then she would gauge how he felt. Was he interested in more? Or did he view their night together as a mistake? If he wanted to forget the whole thing, she would act like that had been her plan all along too. She did have her pride after all. She was confident she could talk her way through wherever the conversation would lead. As a politician and a lawyer, words were her weapon, and she wielded them with a skill that was unrivaled by most.

With her heart pounding in her chest, she took a deep breath and turned the lock on the door and slowly pushed down on the handle.

Throughout the day she had prepared this conversation many times in her head, several versions in fact. One where she tells him it can never happen again. One where she asks him for discretion if they plan to continue. As well as every situation in between. Julia thought she had it all figured out..every conceivable scenario accounted for in her mind.

What she did not anticipate was him standing there waiting for her as she opened the door. No pretense was needed. The sly smile on his face told her he knew exactly why she was there.

She had been avoiding those blue eyes all day, and now she couldn't seem to look away. Everything she had planned to say was gone. She stood there speechless. With one look he had disarmed her entirely.

He made his way towards her with slow and deliberate steps, as if he were stalking his prey. He had a predatory glare to match his steps. He stopped just in front of her and waited. She knew it was up to her to make the next move. Her eyes were immediately drawn to his mouth, and her lips soon followed. Everything she had wanted to say to him, she said with that kiss. Words were not needed.

He backed her into her room, and she found herself pushed up on a table as she made quick work of his shirt buttons that had given her so much trouble before. She all but ripped the white button down shirt off of him, disappointed to find his ballistic vest in the way of the skin she so desperately craved. Without the faintest idea of how to take the vest off, she settled for the skin on his neck and shoulders, placing lingering kisses along the taut muscles as he removed her suit.

“Your job…my job…it just…complicates…everything.” Her words came between ragged breaths as his hands worked their way along her thighs.

This was not the gentle, cautious David from the other night. This was something different, and she liked it. She needed it, needed him right then and there. He seemed to instinctively know her needs as he pushed her panties aside, not bothering to remove any more clothing before entering her. Knowing that he wanted her just as badly was intoxicating. Her arms wrapped around his neck both to hold him close and for stability as his thrusts grew more forceful. She wrapped a leg around him in encouragement.

“Nothing complicates my job. It's to protect you.”

Julia was too lost in the feel of him to register the chill in his voice as he made his declaration. She couldn’t get enough as she clung tightly to his shoulders. Small, crescent-shaped indentations began to form in his skin where her fingernails dug in.

“David! I…God…”

She was nearly there, the sweet release she had wanted from him all day. But then his movements changed, and it was gone. Maybe, she had overestimated his ability to know exactly what she needed. Still, she couldn’t complain as he was doing a damn fine job regardless. As the buildup happened once again though, she figured she’d offer some encouragement to keep him on track.

“Just like that, David. I’m so close.”

“I know,” he growled into her ear before kissing his way down her neck. His rhythm slowed again, easing her back from the brink and preventing the release she needed. The realization that he was doing this deliberately hit her. He hadn’t been clueless to her needs at all, he was toying with her.

“Bastard.” She whispered into his neck.

She felt his whole body shake as he laughed, clearly amused by her frustration as his lips continued their path from her ear to her collar bone.

“Patience.” His voice reverberated against her neck, sending shivers down her spine.

Julia was not a patient woman. She bit down on his shoulder in retaliation. He let out a small hiss but continued his tortuously slow and steady movements.

Her hand grabbed the hair at the back of his neck and directed his mouth to hers for a searing kiss before pulling away. His lips followed, and she moved her head back. He moved closer trying to capture her lips once again, and she pulled back again, staying just out of his reach. When he stopped to look at her, she kissed him briefly, pulling his lip between her teeth before letting go. She wanted to make sure she had his full and undivided attention.

“Don’t tease.” She warned.

“Yes, ma’am.” He said with a wicked smile before increasing his pace.

She snaked an arm around his neck until her fingers reached the opposite side of his vest and she tucked her fingers underneath, seeking her grip as he bucked wildly. Her other arm reached out to the wall next to her, bracing herself further. Her cries of passion echoed throughout the room.

“Shhhh. Your enthusiasm is appreciated, but there is an officer just on the other side of that wall. We don’t want him rushing in here thinking you’re being murdered.”

_God, what a way to go, though. Here lies Julia Montague. She went with a smile on her face._ The whole floor of officers could be out there listening, and at that moment, Julia could not have cared less. Not as long as she was wrapped around David and he was moving just like he was.

David seemed to care though, silencing her with a kiss. Her hand moved to the back of his head, grabbing a fistful of curls as she came undone. His hands gripped her hips hard as he almost immediately followed. 

Julia rested her forehead on his shoulder, trying to catch her breath. He still had a firm grip on her hips. She briefly wondered if there'd be bruises. She could see the red mark on his shoulder where she bit him. They'd both walk away from this night with battle wounds. She could pretty much guarantee that she would be sore in the morning. Blissfully sore. 

“I don't know what got you so riled up, but I suppose I can’t really complain about the outcome.”

She felt his muscles tense.

He placed his hands on her shoulders and pushed her back just enough so she was looking at him.

She could see the hurt and anger in his eyes.

“You left me in your bed without saying a word! You didn't speak to me all day! You could barely look at me.” He had been yelling, but the last part was barely a whisper.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath before opening them again. It looked like they were going to have that talk after all.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's been a while so here are my excuses:  
> -I don't write scenes in order so sometimes it's hard to bridge scenes that I've written. Writing the filler scenes to get to the scenes I actually wanted to write is a chore.  
> -The show skips a few days between the last chapter's scene and the morning cuddles under a sheet scene so I'm still trying to work out how they get there.  
> -When I sat down to edit and rework this chapter, I accidentally wrote 4,000 words about Hades and Persephone instead so that kinda took on a life of it's own and has since doubled in length. Whoops.
> 
> I feel like this has been hanging over my head though so I wanted to get something posted and since I haven't been able to improve on it any in the past few weeks, this is what it is I guess.

"I don't know what got you so riled up, but I suppose I can't really complain about the outcome."

He had almost forgotten that he was upset with her until she spoke those words. He wasn't ready to confront Julia about her knowledge of the attack on the school. Before he did that, he would need more information. His superiors had given him an opportunity when they put him in the room next to Julia's. He would spy on her like they asked, but for his own purposes.

There was some guilt involved in what he was about to do. Orders or not, it didn't feel right having to listen in on conversations she would be having. Ignoring an order from Anne Sampson, though, was not going to keep him employed for long. They would replace him with someone more concerned with spying than with protecting the Home Secretary. He wasn't about to let that happen. He'd give Sampson and Craddock just enough to keep them thinking he was doing their bidding like the good little soldier they thought he was. They had tried to manipulate him. He knew this, and it had still worked to some extent. He was questioning things that he had been ready to dismiss after the shooting. Things that had no longer seemed important until Sampson stirred them up again. He'd gather what information he could to determine what Julia was involved in and what her intentions were. He just needed time. So for now, he'd push that issue to the side. He did have something else he was ready to confront her about though.

"You left me in your bed without saying a word. You didn't speak to me all day. You could barely look at me."

He watched her sigh as she prepared herself for what he assumed would be an apology, or at least something close to it. He got the impression that Julia Montague didn't apologize often, and he had already been on the receiving end of one of those apologies the day they met.

"I am sorry." She stroked the side of his face. "I shouldn't have acted like that. I panicked. I didn't know what to say, and I usually always know what to say. Like I said before, this is complicated."

She had no idea just how complicated it really was though with his new orders. Still, what he had said earlier was true. It didn't affect his job. He'd protect her no matter what. Sleeping together wouldn't change that. David opened his mouth to reiterate that, but she placed her fingers over his lips before he could respond.

"And don't say it isn't."

He playfully nipped at her fingertips.

"Can you honestly tell me that the other night didn't affect you at all today?" She asked.

Okay, so maybe it complicated things a little. He didn't want to answer and give Julia the satisfaction of being right.

She raised an eyebrow and stared him down, demanding an answer.

One look and he was almost ready to confess all of his sins.

"No." He finally admitted. "But at least I didn't act like a child over it."

She narrowed her eyes at his comment.

"My kids give me the silent treatment when they're upset. Please don't do that again."

Her eyes softened a little at the mention of his children. "I won't. I promise."

He couldn't help but wonder what that promise was worth. Julia was a politician. They make promises they can't keep all the time. And despite his willingness to push the school issue aside for now, he still questioned her motives. It couldn't be helped. Her apology seemed sincere, though, and that gave David hope.

She rested her cheek against his shoulder. "I don't think I could ignore you now if I tried." She traced the skin near his collarbone, just above his vest. "You're very hard to resist. Which is why this happened again, despite my better judgment."

"Your better judgment? You're not the only one taking a risk here."

"I know, but it's different with my position. You work for me in a manner of speaking. It could be seen as harassment or coercion."

"You can be very convincing, but I'm not here against my will."

"Even so, my entire career would be over if this got out. Home Secretary has torrid affair with married bodyguard."

"Separated bodyguard," David corrected.

"I doubt the press would care too much about that detail. You'd be offered interviews from every media source, reputable or not."

"I hope you know I would never do that to you."

"I know. I wouldn't have done this if I thought otherwise."

"This isn't exactly the best idea, though, is it?"

"The worst," she added with a hint of playful sarcasm.

"I can't say I mind."

"Me neither." She kissed his cheek. "What I do mind," she said, running her nails down the front of his vest, "is this damn thing in the way. We just can't seem to get all our clothes off, can we?"

He had to laugh when he realized that they were both still partially dressed.

"Well, I was focused on _other_ things."

"Hmm, yes. I suppose that's an acceptable excuse." She grabbed the edges of his vest with both hands and gave it quick pull towards her, bringing his face close to hers. "Where's your focus now, Sargent Budd?"

He was going to have a hard time hearing her address him like that in a professional setting after hearing his title in that sultry voice of hers. She was right, their jobs made this very complicated.

"On you, ma'am. Always on you."

David took a few steps back, leaving Julia perched atop the table.

She placed her hands behind her, leaning back, waiting for him to remove the rest of his clothing.

With two quick movements, he pulled the Velcro at the sides of his vest, his eyes never leaving hers. He loosened the sides, so it was ready to pull off, but he stopped just short of removing it.

She bit her lip in anticipation.

"You too." He pointed to the blouse Julia was still wearing. "This isn't a free show. Fair is fair."

She slid off the table. "I do believe I stripped right here for you two nights ago."

David shook his head.

"And in a television studio," she added.

"Well, if we're talking about the studio, I took my shirt off first."

"Yes, my hero." She started to walk towards him.

"But those times don't count. I was being a gentleman."

"A perfect gentleman. Look where that's got us."

He pulled her close to him.

"I like where it's got us."

She moved in to kiss him but was interrupted by her phone vibrating from somewhere near the sofa. She closed her eyes and sighed. "Damn it."

"The Home Secretary's work is never done."

He watched as she walked to the sofa and leaned over to rummage through the pockets of her coat.

"Enjoying the view, Sargent?"

"Very much, ma'am."

Much to his displeasure, she found her phone quickly and turned back towards him as she checked it.

"I have to return this call. It might take a while."

Her fingers flew across the screen as she began typing.

"Is everything okay?"

"Yes. Just boring work stuff that can't wait until the morning it seems." She didn't bother looking up from her phone, and he could tell that their evening had just been cut short.

"Well, I should call my kids before it gets too late."

"Yeah, I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Tomorrow."

She finally looked up at him and smiled. She walked over to him and with the phone still in hand, her arms wrapped around his neck as she pulled him in for a quick kiss before gently shoving him towards his door.

"Now, please get out before you make me forget about all the important things I need to take care of tonight."

"Okay," David said as he started backing up towards the door. "I'll just try and forget about all the important things I was going to take care of for you." His eyes roamed her still half-dressed body.

"I will murder Rob if what he has to go over so urgently isn't important."

David smiled. "I'll help you hide the body."

"Goodnight, David."

"Goodnight. Oh, and don't worry, ma'am. Next time, getting all of our clothes off will be my top priority." He flashed his cheekiest smile before returning to his room and closing the door behind him.


End file.
